Claire Melody||Favorite one

Meet my niece. Claire Melody. Peachiest of them all, sweetest of ever, and best hand-sucker.

The will of God.

I was going to tell you all about the false alarms that there have been for my soon to be niece who will now be a June baby. And I was going to tell you all about the dream I had last night in which I saved Spiderman as Peter Parker something like a dozen times. But then I went to church this morning.
Church was incredible.

Vendredi/Samedi/Dimanche

I spent this weekend with my older sister and my brother-in-law and my younger sister and my niece to be. There were brownies and coffee and coffee and coffee.
And my best friend.
K showed up. I was tired as ever and worried about French homework and in mid-laughter when she walked through the door in her red shoes. I didn't know, I didn't realize it was her. It was like a dream. I really believed it was a dream, because if you knew how many times I imagine her walking through a door where I am, you might be sad for me. But it was real.
It was real this time.
We sat shoulder to shoulder on a yellow couch and I was too happy.

I learned so much this last week. Here is one of my best things.
You will never truly be happy until you realize that your life is not about you.
Here is my worst thing.
I want to make people laugh. I don't know how to do that, and never before this Friday have I wanted more than ever to make people laugh.

Life is all colors and bliss these days.
I don't know what I want. I don't know who is going to walk through my door. I don't know what to do.
And that is not a sin.
Not knowing is not a sin. Because my life is not about me. The most fabulous thing about that though is that I know it. So here's to coffee and making things and going places and seeing people and "Madeline" and not knowing.

Here is to not being sure.