Hard times are all times.

Dear Fleur.
Mandyana graduated. My grandparents are here. La is visiting. And there is a German girl in my kitchen.
She is so adorable.

Today I read my Bible before slipping on a blue dress and jeans and going to Church early. I'm in Jeremiah now. It's different, different than Isaiah.
Jeremiah makes me cry.
I was having a hard time yesterday with things that happened. Just being reminded. I had to find some time to sit in my bedroom alone and read old letters and Emily Dickinson's poems and pray.
I have been pondering friendships and youth. How I know that sooner or later someone I know my age will die. Like, honest to goodness die. It will have to happen. It's almost inevitable.
People you love sometimes give up.
I realized after a while that I wasn't just afraid of my friends dying a natural death, but a spiritual one. And then I realized that that had already happened before.
I should stop being afraid of what has already happened.

I read somewhere that this is a hard time for dreamers.
It really isn't though.
I think all times are hard for dreamers. No matter the economy or situations or spiritual demises that people you know might meet. I think that the thought of youth and dreams is upsetting me, and it's probably because I am not so young anymore but I still have one million dreams.

I need to finish Norm and Manly. Keep praying. Write more letters. And go drink tea with my little sister and her German friend.
But I have more thoughts to share soon.
About sailboats and Isaiah and paintings and Italy and friends.